reasons i will never move to oklahoma

last weekend we had to go through oklahoma to get to texas. i've gone into that state a few times before and have NEVER had a good experience. this last episode just reiterated to me why i really can't stand that state.

1. toll roads--since when does it cost just to drive on a stinkin road?! and roads full of pot holes! if they're going to charge us, dude, at least make it a smooth ride. why am i having to pay to have my bladder jostled? you'll find out in reason number two.....

2. we honestly passed a sign reading: Free Restrooms--No Purchase Necessary. um, excuse me? free restrooms as opposed to?????

3. another sign which read: Do Not Drive Into Smoke. ok, and just exactly where is this smoke coming from? and if there's smoke, are we supposed to get off on the side of the road and wait for it to pass?

i'm never moving there or going through there again if i can help it (knock on wood, what do you bet that that's where ryan gets into PA school). i'll never live down the first time i ever went on through their tolls....i had no idea that i was going to have to pay. randy was with me (we were going to pick up jason, karen, gloria, and diane). between us, i think we had about 55cents. so what happened? i pleaded and was able to pay by CHECK. and then i was told that if i didn't have any cash next time that i would be arrested. so i pulled off to the nearest gas station (dumb decision, i just had to pay to get back on--but i didn't know that at the time) to see if i could buy something and get some extra cash back. when we bought a bag of candy and i asked the cashier about it, she spoke in a huge voice asking why i needed cash back. i explained why and she repeated in a shocked/amused voice that filled the entire place "you wrote a check at the toll booth?!". so then i had the whole gas station in laughing tears about it. grrrrrrr.....thanks a lot lady. whatever!
the second time i went there was to pick up joycelyn when she was coming home from china. her email said oklahoma airport, so i went (prepared to pay their dumb toll). i get to the airport and am waiting and waiting. finally i hear my name being paged on the intercom to pick up the phone. i find one and low and behold, dad is on the phone telling me joycelyn's at the airport waiting for me to pick her up.
"uh, i'm here!" i told him.
"she's at the airport in springfield" he tells me. excuse me?!

*sigh* always an adventure there. anyone else have good stories to tell about it, i'm all ears.